I can’t believe I find myself dreaming of snow. It’s been unusually warm this winter and the part of me that hates waking up early to brush off my car in the mornings is very grateful. The part of me that has come to rely on snowbanks, icy roads, and perpetual darkness is not happy at all. It’s been such a challenge this week to find ideal opportunities to kill. I’ve prided myself on being a murderer who can strike any time, any where, any way, but I rely heavily on outside factors. When the mood strikes me, I need to be able to hide a body. If I can’t control at least all of the factors, I’m not happy. I know, I know, I need to learn how to go with the flow – and in a lot of ways I do – but frankly, my line of work is very reliant on over preparedness. I can only improvise this much because I’ve put in the work beforehand so when unforeseen factors – like no snow in DECEMBER – put a wrench in my routine, I get a little irritable.
It could also be the holiday season that’s getting me down. I hear that’s a thing that normal people go through. I know I’m not technically a sociopath but I sometimes feel like I don’t understand human emotion to the point of calling them “normal”. For all I know, this is the December blues and has nothing to do with my lack of control over the weather.
Or maybe I’m upset that the police found one of my bodies within the hour rather than a few days from now as is tradition this time of year. Seriously, it is the middle of December; where is the snow?
As always, dear readers,